I have absolutely no doubt that terrible things befall innocent people.

It also seems that deeds done with genuine concern for others seem to be recognised and rewarded often.

So I do not believe in a hard "karma", and there does appear to be something that is karma like in some aspects at work in the universe.

The longer I have been away fromhome, hte more I love coming home.

My wife has learned to do all the exploring she wants while we are travelling away from home, because once I turn the camper towards home, I usually don't stop driving until I get home, be it 10 hours of 20 hours driving, I just go until I get home.

I love the experience of gaining wisdom and insight - of experiencing pround joy and satisfaction and peace at levels I never even dreamed existed.

I guess I do look forward to the next transition, to the next shift in paradigms; yet at the same time I am profoundly satisfied being exactly where I am right now.  I am alive, and life is a process which has aspects of both change and sameness to it.

I think I look forward to enjoying both the sameness and the transcendence that seem most probable in the future.

I see the possibility of life extended indefinitely - of creating processes that rejuvenate the body periodically at a molecular level, and allow every person the possibility of a healthy life that could possibly extend for thousands, millions or billions of years.   The possibility of creating systems and processes that work with the biological ecosystems, rather than ignore them.  I think I could be profoundly happy in such a life, and I am proundly happy now. 

I do not fear death, nor do I seek it.
I live.
I stand for all self aware life living lives of freedom, satisfaction and love.

It may be that I manage to bring www.solnx.org into being, as a tool in bringing this possibility to all, and I may not make it happen, or I may find some other possibility that seems more likely to deliver the desired outcome - I am committed yet not attached.

The short answer seems to be "life" - in all its infinite layers and depths of meaning.

An openness to infinite possibility, a quirky sense of humour, a sense of the ridiculous, an interest in more than themselves (ie me from time to time), flexibility, a willingness to try something different; as well as being able to enjoy routine and familiarity.
Being accepting of who I be is always a big help.

The view.
http://www.fishnet.co.nz/ted/kk.htm

Just about everything else too.

The different ways people recognise love, and the different ways people have of showing love.

It is so easy for people to completely mis-read the signals.

I get to experience first hand how little the conscious entity that is the tip of the "iceberge" that is me actually gets to run the "ship".

I don't believe in an afterlife, I believe we create our heaven or hell here in the present by our choices of actions and beliefs, and the possibilities we choose to create.

If that were not reality, and there is something after death (which doesn't make any sense to me at present) then it would be existence in a matrix that allowed me to experience, act and choose, in relationship with and contribution to, other self aware entities - very much like the life I am leading at present.

For me, prayer is to bring focus and intention to the mind; to still the internal chatter and to take the intention outside of simple occuring desires to some deeper purpose.

In my model, why it works is that it stills the noise that is created by the conscious level mind long enough to be able to hear the intuitions being created by the deeper level unconscious mind.   These intuitions are often profound, and often occur as conversing with some profoundly wise entity that appears outside of us (which is accurate in one sense, yet inaccurate in another).

For me; taking the focus from the conscious level mind, and facilitating communication with the unconscious mind, is an ongoing practice; with huge benefits; but I do not identify it as something other than another part of myself; and I recognise that through it I am intimately connected to all of reality, through the holographic integration of all the inputs available (both external and internal).

What am I ?

The openness, honesty and passion of the communications between my wife and I as we deal with her going through menopause, and being in love with another man, while also loving me, with a lesser intensity, and me loving her as I have never loved anyone else.
Not fair, not easy, and an amazing opportunity for growth and development.

When I have experienced that I totally love my wife, and she totally loves me, and we are aligned on a committed future together.  Those have been, and are, the magic times in my life.

Next would be times of close friendship, acceptance, and when I have achieved things that no one expected me to achieve.

Develop yourself.
Read as much as you can about every different discipline that interests you.
Spend quiet time in contemplation and integration of the new information you have.
Create innner stillness and become present to the deepest levels of intuition that you can - in the light of all this information.
Try a few tests in reality of those intuitions.
If the tests hold up - then trust your own judgement and do whatever it is that calls to you.
I know what calls to me.
I think we are all safest if each of us listens to and follows our own calling, our own deepest intuitions, rather than relying on any sort of external authority - at any level - including me !
Submit this advice to the same test - if it authentically calls to you - use it.

Down here in the Southern Hemisphere it is high summer, even if we do have a southerly coming in from antarctica just at the moment.

It is a time of holidays, fishing, sleeping with just a sheet, 19 hours of daylight, walking the dogs, catching up with family and friends, recharging systems for another years work.

I was on a business trip, and called into a small town 300 miles from my hoe to give a day's training on a computer system, which I did.  After that I went to visit a couple who used to farm near my home, and had moved to Kaikoura, it happened to be her birthday, and one of the people she had invited around for her party is now my wife.

A lot of stuff happened.  I was a solo dad with a 4 year old son, and she was engaged to someone else.  Over 3 years of long distance courtship, breaking up and getting back together many times, we have been married for 14 years.

This question arrived New Year's morning down here in NZ, and it has had me thinking.

There are two major competitors for the the title, a brush with mortality in having a melanoma removed from my left temple; and a deep enquiry into the nature of love and commitment as my wife battled with depression and panic attacks; and we came to terms with her love for another man.

For me it has lead to a deep sense of peace with my life, if I die tomorrow or I die in 100 years or 10 billion years time, I do not fear death; and I will take reasonable steps to avoid it - including working on life extension, and the social and technological systems required to bring stability.

Getting to see new levels of depth of the unconsious patterns that run so much of my life has been profound this year.  The depth of love and compassion that has flowed has been amazing.